Wednesday, April 10, 2013

What will I wear? Can I be comfortable in my own skin?

This is a keeping it real post for me. And the title does NOT mean I am coming to the conference in my birthday suit! (although it is my birthday on the weekend!)

As the Around the Table Bloggers conference approaches in a few days, my anxiety levels are rising and panic attacks are bubbling around the surface making me think it would be easier to pull out than to put myself in a social situation where I may feel out of place...or worse still, invisible *gasp*.

Don't get me wrong, I am in awe of those Christchurch girls. I have utter admiration for them. They are so amazing with what they have pulled together. Utterly amazing.

And there are so many bloggers I want to meet in real life. So many.

I just feel my blogging has been a little... um... absent. My connecting through commenting has been, um... absent. My blog reading -- in the same category.

So much has been happening for us ... the international move was so intense, trying so hard to get on top of a bowel infection, living out of a suitcase (again) at my in laws, testing me to all my limits.

A couple of weeks ago I was worried about what I was going to wear and then I got over that and decided to just wear what I'm comfortable in. But now it's about being comfortable in my own skin.


The reality is we are all coming from our different REAL lives with our REAL selves on show. It's a little painful to reveal those things we can hide on our blogs...
Like my little toes have no toe nails? yes, really.

I know from experience that I LOVE bloggers, especially those I meet in real life, so please come and say hello on the weekend. I'm pretty good at covering up my insecurities most of the time, with loudness and inappropriate laughter, but just know I will be a quivering mess underneath it all.

I'm not naturally a huggy person but I have learnt to hug (thanks boob-squishing huggy American host family!) and if you say something kind I am likely to cry. Just warning you.




27 comments:

Mrs A said...

I am so exited to meet you!!!!

Cat said...

I AM a hugger and I WILL hug everyone (but you know that!)
Grab your onsie
Grab your jeans
Grab your converse
Grab your sushi
And lets have a great weekend
A lot of us are riding the same emotional roller coaster
HUG

Sophie Slim said...

Ahhhhahaha to Cats comment ^^ heeheee

can't wait to meet you Leonie! We're all in the same. Its easy to edit what we want to put on show on our blogs, I'm looking forward to meeting the unedited versions of us all :)
x

Leonie said...

Were all in this together - and honestly i really dont think anyone is going to look further than all the smiling faces!

TracyP said...

You will be awesome hunny!
You are an amazing beautiful lady who I have the pleasure of calling a true friend!! Have a blast I wish I was coming with you!!

Sophie Slim said...

P.s - YOUR PHOTOS ARE SO LOVELY AND JOYFUL!!

Widge said...

I think we are all feeling a little this way Leonie! I know I am. I wrote a similar post the other day but never pressed publish :)
I've stressed over the clothes, how to behave, feeling invisible etc too.
Lets get over it and enjoy each other instead!!
It's gonna be completely awesome! X

Stella Rutherford said...

<3 <3 <3 I'm REALLY looking forward to meeting you Leonie, and all those other fab ladies. We will all feel nervous and anxious to begin with, but I betcha after a few minutes we'll feel like we've known each other forever!!! xxxx

PaisleyJade said...

I love you to bits Leonie - and I know everyone else will. Sooooo looking forward to hanging with you.

Miriam said...

I had something fun to say and now I've forgotten it. My personal hope is that not one person feels invisible on the weekend and I know together we can make that possible. Looking forward to meeting you and I have awful manly toenails xxxx :-)

jennie said...

Such an excellent post Leonie!
It is SO nerve wracking meeting bloggers in real life. You guys are going to have the best time together, take loads of photos for us!! Have a brill weekend!XXXXJ

nz green buttons said...

I've got a bunch of things to comment about on this post, but I think it will reveal too many of my worries about this weekend, so I'll just say.... Can't wait to meet you! And you know I'm going to be checking out those toes now :)

clare's craftroom said...

I'm not a huggy person just ask anyone . Go on ask . But I would hug you xx Have a great time I'm looking forward to a full report.

Little Gumnut said...

You're going to have an incredible time!!!

Little Gumnut said...

You're going to have an incredible time!!!

Neetz said...

Hey you........... they are gonna LOVE ya. They really are. Heck think about our first whangarei meet up!! haha.. I was a bit worried about how that would go, and man did we all hit it off famously!!

You'll be great... :) Always are.
Have a fab time and get extra spesh attention cos its yer Birthy-day!!! xxx Love lots.. your REAL LIFE friend xxx

Ange - Tall, Short and Tiny said...

The only thing about this post I CAN'T agree with is the hugging thing - I am a hugger, but a respectful one, so if you don't want me to hug you, I promise I won't :)
So excited to meet you in mere hours xx

Jess B said...

I'm looking forward to meeting you - I think - know - we'll all be nervous but just think: we'll all feel like celebrities because people will recognise us from our photos on our blogs! And my little toenails are so munted they may as well not exist - toe buddies!

Jennifer said...

You will be fine :o) What's not to love about you? You are totally, TOTALLY one of the most friendly and kind members in blog land. I am so glad we've been able to stay in touch and meet up twice :o) Have fun at the conference, I'm quite intrigued by it all so will be interested to hear how it goes! Might have come myself if I wasn't back in the States already *sniff*

Jennifer said...

Super cute photos, by the way!!!

Simoney said...

GREAT post.
And THIS is why you blog.
So much to share... those who have met you in real life already love you.
Trust that, OK?
Looking forward to hanging out!!

CHD said...

You will be great. I'm kind of wishing I was going with you. Love your red birks by the way. Red shoes always make me smile. Cx

Max said...

my little toe nails are munted too!
and i what i'm going to wear is the least of my worries, it's "how am i going to cover the 5 (yes five!) cold sores i have?!! just dont make me laugh when we meet cause it's so painful!!!
so looking forwards to meeting you and wishing you a happy birthday in person! xxx

offsquare said...

I've spent 2 weeks trying to decide what to wear. Could still change my mind on the day! You're right though, it's all about being comfortable with who you are first. Can't wait to meet you! I'll be hiding my insecurities with nervous giggles and shyness.

Sima J said...

You are going to LOVE it .. you will look back and go 'what was I even worried about' and you are going to laugh and laugh and laugh (and possibly cry when someone says something nice?) xo I'm glad you had the guts to meet all us crazy Whangarei Bloggers or we all would have missed out - have the BEST time! :-) xoxo

Bron said...

Hope the weekend is amazing for you all. x

Tall Pipi said...

Leonie, I LOVED meeting you in the flesh. I loved that we all came, we saw, we accepted each other for who we are and we were REAL! Thanks for being you. xxx